5.25.15 SC Playoffs Game Recap (Biblical Level Flooding)

So I’ll be honest folks. Yesterday I drove home from Houston in what should have been PLENTY of time to watch the stupid game, except there were massive thunderstorms in south Texas and a 2 ½ hour drive ended up taking more than 6. (Check my twitter for real time freaking out.)

By the time I got home, I couldn’t handle watching OT. Which ended up being FINE because there was only like 45 seconds of it anyway.

Blackhawks vs D*cks
Final score: Blackhawks 4 – D*cks 5
Series: Blackhawks 2 – D*cks 3

I was being rerouted by my mother through Manor, TX after I discovered that 290 was shut down because of water on the highway when I called my friend to find out that the Hawks were down three goals in the first.

Let me tell you, not what I wanted to hear.

Goals from Cam “my name is literally fouler” Fowler and Ryan “only worthwhile during the Olympics” Kesler came 32 seconds apart in the 5 minute mark of the first period. Only two goals in 32 seconds, I guess they’re getting sloppy.

Sami “I swear that’s my real name” Vatanen scores ten minutes later and I bet he heard about it in the locker room later. (You know, because it wasn’t five seconds after Kesler’s.) We go into the first intermission with the D*cks up 3-0.

BUT WHO CARES, RIGHT? I’m about to get swept away by flood waters (I’m being slightly dramatic and people really did get swept away and oh my god, Texas is a mess right now) and this stupid game is just, you know, HAPPENING.

Thankfully, around the time that I’m rerouting through Taylor, TX only to find my road blocked by (you guessed it) MORE WATER, the Blackhawks come out and DOMINATE the second period.

Teuvo “go on, scratch me again you a-hole” Teravainen sparks a comeback with this nifty little shot between two defensemen:

Seriously, how beautiful is that goal? It’s a beauty.

And then that little beauty set up Brent “fruit and crap” Seabrook for this goal in the last minute of the period:

Not the kind of goal we normally see from Seabrook, he didn’t even wind up for the shot!

And we go into the second intermission only down one.

So I’m just getting to Hutto to find out that one route is again blocked by flooding, turning around, yelling at god and the sky and rain in general (and a little bit my mother, which I feel bad about) when the third is happening. Patrick “it’s literally red, just red” Maroon scores early in the third to give the D*cks a 4-2 and I start to despair. And honestly, that would probably have been kinder.

Instead, Jonathan “I will not let you fuckers ruin my night on Hockey Night In Canada” single handedly gives the Hawks the tie with two back to back goals in the final two minutes of the game.


If I were a better person, I’d probably feel sorry for Andersen on that second goal. There’s no way that goes in without banking off something in front, Toews is literally behind the goal line.

And overhead view looks like it went in off Andersen. Lucky bounces, we got ‘em.

I finally fall into my bed just as intermission begins. I think briefly about turning on the game but decide that extended OT is just not something I can deal with, so I shoot things in Mass Effect 3 instead.

Only to get the notif literally 45 seconds into OT that Matt “tired of playing the Blackhawks” Beleskey scored the game winning goal. D*cks win.

Merrin goes to bed.

What we learned:

I’m never watching The Mighty Ducks again.


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